If… (Week 54)

This is week fifty-four in my personal “If… Project” in which I answer questions from the book “If… (Questions for the Game of Life)”

There are 125 pages of this book, each with four questions. I plan to take one page each week and answer the questions as thoroughly and honestly as I am able. In addition, I invite you to answer the questions along with me, whether it be in the comments section, your own personal blog, or just within your own thoughts.

Perhaps in doing so, we will get to know each other better, but even more importantly, get to know ourselves better.

This week’s questions:

If you had to have one family member (besides your spouse) witness your next sexual act, who would you pick?

Just when I was starting to get bored with the trite questions, you throw this one into the mix, Mr If Book. Nicely played, sir. Nicely played, indeed. A tip of the hat to you.

For starters, ew. Now, it definitely wouldn’t be my mother. Or sister. Or brother. Or any of my nieces and nephews (can you say jailtime?). Grandparents? They’re either already dead or close enough that witnessing gay sex would finish them off.

I had a couple older cousins growing up that I remember thinking were cute, but I’m fairly sure they’ve all let themselves go by now, so having them there wouldn’t even give me something cute to look at anymore.

I’m starting to lean toward one of my uncles. I know he’s a bit of a photographer, and I think were he to be there, I could maybe just kill two birds with one stone and have him take some pictures (tasteful ones. not trashy porno pics). I’ve always wished I had the body and the look to be a nudie model, so I’d just use this excuse to cross that off the list too. But only if he had knew a photoshop magician to edit the pictures.

If you could see anyone alive fully naked, who would you select?

Well, I just saw Ryan Reynolds on tv and he’s always been luscious, so let’s pick him. Ask me again tomorrow and the answer will be completely different. And different again on Tuesday.

If you could see one famous person from history fully naked, who would it be?

James Dean? I dunno. I’m trying to think of famous dead people, but all that’s coming to mind is him and Young Elvis. I guess dead people just don’t turn me on much.

If you could be any sports figure now alive, who would you want to be?

A sexy male gymnast. Mostly just because I want a body like that. Are there any famous male gymnasts to pick from though? Who was the cute one from the Olympics last summer? Jonathan someone? Sure, him.

Those are my answers to this week’s questions. What are yours?