Atlantic Shitty

I guess they can’t all be winners.

The trip to Atlantic City was, for the most part, a comedy of errors. Minus the comedy.

The day started off badly with the rental car having a virtually empty tank of gas when we got it, thus delaying us in getting started as we now had to find a gas station and fill it. And then traffic ended up being a complete nightmare.

The total traveling time from NYC to Atlantic City is approximately two and a half hours. Two and a half hours into our journey we were just finally leaving NYC. There were construction signs, yet no construction to be seen anywhere. There were police cars and ambulances, yet no accident to be seen. There was just bumper to bumper traffic that would not budge.

We finally got into New Jersey only to get lost twice and half to backtrack. That was all due to the horrible signage. But even if we hadn’t had those two minor detours, it wouldn’t have gotten us to Atlantic City any faster, because traffic was still a nightmare. It was another two hours until it finally thinned out enough to reach the 60 mile per hour mark on the speedometer.

So, about six hours after we started our journey, we finally arrived in Atlantic City. It was 6:30pm and we had only enough time to glance at the Boardwalk and grab a bite to eat before we had to be at Harrah’s to see the show.

We ended up at a restaurant called Sonsie where the menu left a lot to be desired for a Vegan. I ended up with a plate of lettuce drizzled in a vinaigrette, and some grilled broccoli rabe and tomatoes.

Inspired.

We finished dinner and made our way to Harrah’s with the clock ticking. There were no parking spots to be found in the parking garage, so Kevin dropped me off to run inside to get our tickets from the box office before the closed while he continued to find a spot. When I tried to pick up the tickets, they needed to see ID, and since the tickets were under Kevin’s name, they needed his. So, that didn’t work. He ended up having to valet park and got to the box office to pick up the tickets about 5 minutes after the show started.

We ended up missing the opening number, which is arguable the best number in the show. And then it turned out that the show had been cut for the casino.

You see, when Broadway shows play in a casino venue, often times they are required to cut the show to ninety minutes, because the casino does not want their patrons sitting in a theatre for two and a half hours. They want them back out on the casino floor buying drinks and losing their money on the slot machines.

So, the show ended up being really short with a lot of our favorite songs cut out. Bummer.

After the show, we met up with Kevin’s friend (she was in the show) and we ended up at a bar next to her hotel. And this was the beginning of the most enjoyable portion of the trip. They had $1.50 beer, interesting locals, and some of the worst karaoke I’ve ever heard in my life.

I had a bit to drink and ended up stealing a random cup that was just laying around before capping off the night by giving a giant horse statue a rimjob.

Yes, you read that correctly.

There’s no photographic evidence of that, but it was caught on video. It may appear in an upcoming Field Trip, so keep your eyes peeled for that. I know horse rim jobs are high on everyone’s wishlist, and I aim to please.

Went back to the hotel room and called it a night. Got up early this morning and drove back to the city. This time it only took the normal two and a half hours, but even so we were less than five minutes late in returning the rental car back by noon. Enterprise closes at noon on a Saturday. Who in their right mind closes for business at noon on a Saturday?!

So, we had to drop it off at the next nearest Enterprise location which ended up being LaGuardia airport. There were issues with catching the bus and finding a cab, so we started walking in hopes of finding one or having one stumble upon us, and the next thing you know we had walked all the way from the airport back to my apartment.

And that was the conclusion to a weekend that, on the whole, ended up being pretty crappy. And even though it was pretty crappy, I’m still glad I experienced it. And at moments, had a pretty good time.

I learned a valuable lesson on this trip. It doesn’t matter where you go or what happens while you’re there. The thing that matters most is that you surround yourself with good people and enjoy their company first and foremost.

And I did.